If sin were a disease, it would be feared and dreaded more than any other because of the pain and suffering it causes those who contract it. Sin is a killer and like cancer, it often spreads so quickly, that by the time it is detected, it’s too late to do anything about it. Sin is both hereditary and contagious. You have to be careful to not get too close to someone infected with it and be aware that you may be predisposed toward a certain type of sin because of the sins of your parents.
“And Amnon said unto him, I love Tamar, my brother Absalom’s sister” (2 Samuel 13:4). Amnon’s confession of love to his friend Jonadab was understood to mean that he wanted to have sexual relations with his brother’s sister, Tamar. In response, Jonadab lays out a plan for Amnon to rape her. These two men were not only related to each other, they were both related to king David, the father of the woman Amnon was planning to rape.
David’s sin with Bath-sheba had caused his family to become infected with sin. In the same way that David had given in to his lust for Bath-sheba, Amnon decided he was going to have sex with Tamar. What was different about Amnon’s situation was that Tamar was a virgin and unlikely to agree to have sex with him outside of marriage.
Amnon’s friend Jonadab is described as being very subtil. The Hebrew word for subtil, chakam actually means wise (2450). Jonadab’s plan was not some sinister plot, but a well thought out means of obtaining what Amnon wanted, a private encounter with Tamar. Most likely, the intent was to have sex secretly, so that if anyone found out, Amnon could deny it.
“And she answered him, Nay, my brother, do not force me; for no such thing ought to be done in Israel; do not thou this folly” (2 Samuel 13:12). The word translated folly, “nebalah is most often used as a word for serious sin. It signifies ‘disregarding God’s will'” (5039). In other words, Amnon knew what God’s will for him was regarding Tamar and he decided to do the opposite. Jonadab was an accessory to his crime, and together, the two of them planned to deceive king David and trap his daughter Tamar, so that Amnon could have sex with her.
Rather than keeping it a secret, Tamar displayed her shame openly after Amnon raped her. “And Tamar put ashes on her head, and rent her garment of divers colours that was on her, and laid her hand on her head, and went on crying” (2 Samuel 13:19). The word used to describe Tamar’s condition afterward, desolate or shamem in Hebrew means ruined (8076), but the root word shâmêm (shaw – mame´) means to stun or intransitively to grow numb (8074). Tamar was traumatized by what happened to her and most likely suffered from what we know today as Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) the rest of her life.